Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Love n Marraige

Writing the blog after a long time. I was thinking about this thing for a long time. This blog is all about love and marriage. Valentine's Day has just gone. I and my friend were returning from aerobics by 7'o clock in the morning. We saw a guy standing with bouquet and a gift in his hand with lots of happiness filled in his eyes. We both commented the guy like "for the first time in his life he might have got up early and might have got ready so quickly". We have watched lots of things like this during our college days.

During my school days according to me love is something sin like thing. The persons who in love without their parent's knowledge are bad people. Nowadays I have matured a lot in my thoughts regarding this thing. I have realized now what true love is. During school days most of us doesn't know what love is. What we know is all about what we see in movies. Hero and heroine will fall in love, a villain will be their and they will join together overcoming the villains tactics in the climax. I have seen in my school days college guys giving letters to school girls. Most of the girls will get frightened; some will just start speaking to the guy. Since I studied in a girl’s school my classmates used to tell lots of stories about these things. These things haven't bothered me much during my school days since myself and my friends had lot of other things to discuss.

When I entered my college, my attitude towards love changed a lot. I have seen lots of love pairs in my college. I used to wonder how many of them will marry. They say their love is true. They won't bother about anything, their future, their career, their parents etc. They will just talk talk such that no can hear. They used to think that is love. Love at first sight is applicable only to movies not to real life. Love is something that comes out after knowing each other well. We will start liking that person, moved by their character, will make think that life with him/her will be happy and peaceful. Most of the people say easily that their love got break since their parent's didn't accept, this is an escaping excuse according to me. I have seen most of the girls saying bye easily to the guy once their parents didn't agree. I wonder why they are not thinking about this thing before falling into love. I used to wonder how girls are like that, without hesitation they are spoiling their life and the guy's life and were able to marry other guy. If their love is true they should just be strong in their love, should talk to their parents. It will take time for them to accept, we should make them understand how our life will become miserable loving one person and marrying other. Our parents will think of society and this is the major hindrance to them. This fear about society will make them to protest against love. In our society love marriage is not common and all love marriage hasn't been successful. Even if it has succeeded no one will think about that. People's tendency is to look into negative example at first. They used to think only arranged marriages go on well which is also not true. We should make our parents understand that once we live happily society will not speak about this; they will have some other matter by now to speak. Our happiness is what they expect at last.

Betraying our parents and marrying is the other thing which is not acceptable. Our parents have looked into each and every need in our life from our childhood and have fulfilled them. Just after settling in life leaving them and going away is not a good thing. Betraying is the most hurting thing which will just create a hatred ness. "The world is just a small round", we will paid for what we have done within our life time. Be happy and make people around us also happy.


At 12:45 PM, Blogger யாத்திரீகன் said...

the word Love in english is used in many terms unlike Tamil. The affection between a Father and her daugher is also love, at sametime the kinda feeling between two youngsters is also called love,.. but now, atleast in our country , this word is being misused or misunderstood a lot (may be because of tamil cinemas :-)

>>> since myself and my friends had lot of other things to discuss


during my school days, i had couple friends who wrote letters with blood, thank god !
eventhough we used to site girls, atleast i had the basic commensense :-)

>>> will just talk talk such that no can hear

yeah, me too wondered a lot how they are able to do this and what the heck do they talk daily so long :-)))

>>> they are not thinking about this thing before falling into love

hmmm.... rite point... but if you ask them , they would say a poetic explanation "Love is Blind"

whenever i think of love, the very next thing that comes to my mind is Parrents... , Once
there was an argument with my roomies, when i was at onsite. It was about whether love
marriage is good or not, you'l not believe we 3 ppl argued/fighted almost 5 continous hours in a sunday evening.... during the start me and other guy were against love but towards the end, only me was left against the love..

My argument was like...., "I dont blindly hate love or blindly be against love. I am against only people who hurt thier parrents by falling in love"..

say, if there is a set of parrents little bit open minded (no parents would 100% accept love, not just because they hate love, but just an over care they have on thier children) surely theyl never be hurted by thier children loving, surely they will talk to their child and thier choosen partner, try to understand whether they both are in infactuation or real love.. etc.. and proceed..

there are these other set of parrents, so innocent, they believe so much in us, they allow us to take our decisions during studies, or going to work or going aborad, or making other career plans, but when children of these parents go and stand before them with love, is this what they expected from them ? Is this the best result that a child could give in returns of TRUST what the parents had kept on them ?

Parents-kunu evlo kanavugal irukum, sure, namakum namma life pathi kanavugal irukum, athu nama life,not our parents life..ellam true, BUT WHAT IS WORTH OF PROCEEDING TO MAKING OUR DREAMS COME TRUE BY CRUSHING YOUR PARENTS TRUST AND DREAM WITH

arranged marriage-naley, munna pina theriyaatha aal, but love marriage-na nalla palagunom-nu oru reason solraanga.. but its realy idiotic reason..

when ppl love, they dont see the negatives, they grow more expectations.. so when they see even a small -ve after marriage, it bursts like anything..

but when arranged.. you tend to adjust yourself or make the other adjust to yourself, that is called love...

rendu likely thinking ulavunga seratha vida, konjam differences thaan makes life interesting.. surely making it a problem or making it interesting is in your hands... whether its love or arranged marriage.. so dont blame arranged marraige..

then, they say... jaadhi and other social differences will go off...cmon.. its another bull shit reason.. , show me a intercast love marriage, after which the girl hasnt turned into the guys cast or the kid hasnt choosen any cast... it will never happen..

for that to change.. every individual has to do thier role in the society, so athukum the type of marraige-kum avlo neraya influence kedayathu...

sometimes, ppl even say that oru kolandhaiyoda vantha parents manasu maariruvaanga, cmon.. they dont change minds but they just have to accept you, no other go... but whatever they accept, Avunga manasula naama erpaduthuna Kaayam , Kaayam thaaney.. athu ennaikumey aaraathu.. athu manasula uruthikitey irukum... is that what we should gift our parents.. ?

life-ndrathu enathu, orutharuku oruthar vitukudutho porathu, orutharoda enangala aduthavunga mathichu nadakurathu.... so why dont we apply that to our parrents.. you can even say, why cant we expect that from our parrents to do it for us,... cmon.. your parrents have already sacrificed thier entire life for you..., if at this point you say that, who asked them to sacrifice, its foolish decision by them, did i ask them to do so, or say its thier duty.. then you are sick !! I know a person from a very remote village but given abundance freedom to go out of village and study (there werent much girls studying so high in their community)..., then that friend was sent out to long distance to work in a very remote place.. that too when the friends close relatives pressed so much not to send that far, the parents had so much confidence,trust and love to make the friends wishes to come true... then the friend even went to a different country when the entire set of relatives were against this decision.. still the parents had the same trust and love to make her wisehs true..

at the end do you know what happened, the friend didnt care of the parents trust or the other childrens future, the friend came with a love to the parents.. and the love was like proposed in a telephonic conversation, from whom the friend used to chat for 1 hour daily and that too, the way it was proposed was like, "lets start moving close to eachother, if you wish lets continue, else we can depart"...., i really dunno how genuine this is, on outer it may look a very gentle approach, but i personally feel its such a mean approach..

i would again say..
Parents-kunu evlo kanavugal irukum, sure, namakum namma life pathi kanavugal irukum, athu nama life,not our parents life..ellam true, BUT WHAT IS WORTH OF PROCEEDING TO MAKING OUR DREAMS COME TRUE BY CRUSHING YOUR PARENTS TRUST AND DREAM WITH YOUR FEAT...

if really the parents are ready for any of your decisions, then you choosing your own partner is always better (but it needs to be the right age and right way)...

otherwise.. LET US NOT SPOIL THE TRUST AND DREAMS OF OUR PARENTS.... cauz.. once its destroyed.. it hurts a LOT...

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